JUGGLERS' TALES

Found a way to keep all the balls that really matter in the air? Score high on the RENEW-O-Meter? How did you do it? Really, how? What changes did you make, and how long did it take to decide to change, and then do it? Who helped? What didn't help? Your story will encourage others...pass it on. Thanks.

Here's one tale of renewal, from a physician: "My family and I decided I wasn't spending enough time with the kids. So I started coaching my son's baseball team. How did I possibly find the time? Two words: 'decreased income.' And it was worth it...really worth it."

Please e-mail your tale to juggler@renewnow.org

~ Brevity is a virtue ~

"Initially, our family's renewal was forced upon us. My husband lost his high-tech job after years in the industry. We unexpectedly added another child to our family for a full complement of three kids under age five. As the one with a job, I had to go back to work 11 weeks after giving birth via c-section and still suffering post-partum depression. My employer offered six-month new-parent leave, but we wouldn't have been able to live on partial pay. Soon after I returned my organization downsized and we all took on extra responsibilities. Needless to say, our family life also underwent a major restructuring!

Two years later, my husband is still the stay-at-home parent and I'm the sole wage-earner. Lots of anguish, disappointment, humiliation, resentment, worry, fear and hope underlie that simple statement. We swallowed our pride, restructured our debt, and accepted my parents' help to buy a bigger car. We also sought counselling, though it nearly broke our marriage to do so.

Our apparent misfortune has turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me (can't speak for my husband)--we fell into exactly the setup we'd always dreamed of. Our children are positively blooming--they are in pig heaven with Daddy at home, and I feel wonderful knowing that they have a parent to teach them, love them and look out for them. If none of this had happened, we would still be a two-income family, complete with a nanny, lots of stress, and lonely, possibly insecure children. It took us a year or so to recognize our blessing for what it is---it was tough to shake our traditional role expectations and personal visions of how it SHOULD work rather than how it COULD work. I have never been so happy about the life we've created."